WHY? F*CKING WHY?

Can all of us, political affiliations notwithstanding, agree that killing puppies by putting firecrackers in their mouths is just plain wrong?

Al Weed campaign update

Thought I'd share a little blurb from Al Weed's campaign update:

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AL WEED PROPOSES PLAN TO SAVE CLARKTON BRIDGE
Apply for State and National Historic Registers Congressional Candidate Says

Al Weed, the Democratic candidate for Congress in Virginia’s 5th District, today offered a proposal for saving Clarkton Bridge from VDOT’s planned Friday demolition of the 103 year-old structure. Weed suggested applying for inclusion of the bridge in the Virginia Landmarks and National Historic Registers and getting a court injunction to halt the demolition pending the result of the application.

"It’s crazy for VDOT to spend taxpayer dollars to destroy an historic and cherished local landmark…especially since it would cost more to destroy Clarkton Bridge than to renovate it," said Weed, a Nelson County farmer and retired Command Sergeant Major in the U.S. Army Special Forces. "Not only is this government bureaucracy at its worst, it’s the only time I’ve ever seen VDOT try to do anything on time."

In addition to explaining the bridge’s historic significance, Weed pointed out the economic benefits of preserving rather than demolishing Clarkton Bridge. According to Weed, Charlotte and Halifax County businesses would profit from the nature tourism and heritage tourism that would be drawn to the unique landmark. The bridge would be a sure tourist draw with its ideal location overlooking the Staunton River, its potential as a stop on the Virginia Birding and Wildlife Trail, its position as a link in a regional hiking-biking-riding trail network, and its charming architecture.

"Here we have a perfect example of something that can help create jobs in Southside that can’t be shipped off to China, and VDOT wants to tear it down. It’s nuts."

In addition to having experience as a farmer and a soldier, Weed has experience in rural land use issues and land conservation. For his years of conservation work, Governor Mark Warner recognized Mr. Weed’s efforts by naming him as the 5th District Trustee for the Virginia Land Conservation Trust Fund.

"Sometimes the effort to preserve tradition may look like an effort to block progress. In this case, demolishing the Clarkton Bridge chips away at our heritage and achieves no progress. VDOT would be wrong to tear down the bridge," said Weed. "Governments are supposed to take orders from their citizens—not the other way around."
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This is also the last day of the quarter, and the last day to help Mr. Weed's 225K goal on his blog. The figure currently on the blog has been there for a week, so I'm guessing he's closer to 225K than indicated.

And redneckers, they get us pissed/And stupid stuff, it makes us shout...

My dear friend from college surprised me with a box from Amazon (ooh, I do so love getting those Amazon boxes!); the Pixies DVD. It's all a delight, the concert, the "documentary" (Bowie, Thom Yorke, PJ Harvey, and others taking turns kissing tush), the "stalking Kim Deal", er, I mean, the "behind the scenes" film, but there's one reason I'd recommend this to anyone in my age group.

The hilariously shitty videos.

Granted, some of them are purposefully shitty, like "Monkey Gone to Heaven", but "Velouria", even as a joke, is like watching flies...make a shitty rock video. Even the "good" ones, like "Here Comes Your Man" and "Alec Eiffel" have a cheap sheen that you just can't see on MTV anymore, now that a six-figure budget and dressing girls in TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE CLOTHING WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THAT...sorry...have become requirements for videos. You gotta love the fact that 3/4 of the band knew how ugly and unmarketable they were, and put themselves on the screen anyway.

Hopefully I'll be able to catch them on their reunion tour after getting screwed by Lollapalooza. God bless the Pixies.

Let me finish! Let me finish! Me angry! BUSH SMASH!

Via CmdrSue, I discovered this hilarious and alarmingly accurate annotation of Dubya's disasterous interview on Irish TV, where the reporter had the temerity to ask follow-up questions.

That's our representative abroad, ladies and gentlemen. When I lived in Russia, my friends used to cringe whenever Yeltsin was shown on the news, and I never fully understood why. I do now...

Saturday on the Downtown Mall with liberals, farmers, and corgis...

Saturday morning is more or less the same for the Mrs. and I; stagger out of bed, strap the Gentle Leader on Mr. Monty, and get ourselves down to the City Market for fresh produce, coffee, and in my case, basking in the reflective glow of passers-by stopping to pet my doggie. Today was especially chatty; while my wife was in the dog-free area actually shopping for veggies, I strolled around the outside perimeter getting quizzed about Cowboy Bebop and Television Without Pity (wore the T-shirt this morning).

I also stopped by our local theater to see people stretching out on a blanket two hours in advance waiting for Fahrenheit 9/11 tickets. It looked like a Star Wars line without the dressing up (well, I guess some of them sorta looked like Michael Moore by skipping the morning shower), amazing.

Also bumped into my buddy (hi, buddy, if you're reading this!) who met Al Weed this week and came away very impressed. If you have the opportunity, again, read his blog and give him some cash, because getting rid of Virgil "As A Congressman, He's Not Very" Goode would be great by itself, but replacing him with a man of Weed's caliber and character is a chance that shouldn't be missed.

Does Dick Cheney kiss the Clone Guardian of Embryo Vat 9-XV2 on planet Vyxzrk Z-vector Six with that mouth?

Yep, our veep crawled out of his hole long enough to curse out Vermont senator Patrick Leahy. I would say this is indisputable proof that Bush and Cheney are an embarrassment to our country and the Republican Party, but we all knew that anyway.

And does anyone else secretly hope that Kerry picks Leahy as his VP candidate just so he can debate Cheney?

Wow, a total eclipse in Central Virginia! No, wait, that's just Michael Moore blotting out the sun...

I don't think I'll be seeing Fahrenheit 9/11 on opening night; our local theater has already put out warnings on its website that it doesn't sell tickets in advance and that lines will probably be long, so I can wait.

I will eventually see it, though. Moore may be an obnoxious schmuck, but he's OUR obnoxious schmuck...

We've sighted the Millenium Falcon, Lord Nader...

I've been in a conversation with Ellen about Nader and his impact on the presidential race, a topic on Kos that I've enjoyed following on various diaries but have no desire to participate in.

If Nader gets more than 1% this time, I'll eat a salad. Yeah, I know what he's polling, but since even the Green party isn't sure about Nader this time, he's just going to get the groupies.

Still, I can't feel TOO bad for Kerry, just because I remember freezing my tuckus off in front of Harris Teeter trying to convince people to vote for another candidate, while my partner made the argument that it would be better for the Dems to nominate a centrist that had appeal to former Nader voters than, say, a liberal even liberals thought was a bit of a cold fish.

But they didn't listen, and no, I'm not bitter (my teeth always grind like this). As far as I'm concerned, Kerry owes us all a win, so let him go out there and be electible. He has my help, and he needs to worry about the 90% in the middle, not the two radicals in the presidential race with him.

What the hell am I going to do with all this black eyeliner and Zima?

My sister called me earlier today to let me know that Lollapalooza had been cancelled, so no Morrissey, PJ Harvey, Sonic Youth, or Modest Mouse in a festival setting with $8 bottles of water for us. Dammit. Well, if pale, slightly androgynous thirtysomethings start roving the streets in packs society only has itself to blame.

Up yours, J. Lo!

Thanks to my brother for the subject title and the article.

"Senator, have you ever looked at this website?

I just got an e-mail inviting me to send a question to John Kerry. The best questions will apparently be answered at a house party conference call. Well, if you're going to copy off another Democratic candidate, copy from the best *achHowarddeanchoo*...

Sorry, allergies...

Anyway, what would YOU ask John Kerry?

Don't harass me, can't you tell, I'm going home, I'm tired as hell, I'm not the cat I used to be, I got a kid, I'm thirty-three baby...

Well okay, I got a corgi, but it is my 33rd birthday today (along with my twin brother)...surprise!

Mike: Why do you keep jumping out with a cake yelling "surprise"?
Neil: It's my birthday.
Mike: Now you already knew that and we don't care, so where's the surprise?

I'm not going to go all Kelly Osbourne on ya, but if you're feeling generous and want to spread birthday cheer, give Al Weed a buck.

TOP FIFTY, BABY!

That's right, the Mighty Duo of Wonderfulness, our Urban Challenge team, smashed last year's performance with a 50th-place finish and an official time of 3 hours, 57 minutes. I'm so full of...what's the opposite of self-loathing?

Kudos all around to my sis for running and my brother and CmdrSue for research...

It's time to play NAME THAT HACK!

OK, who the fuck wrote this? Under a rather innocuous headline we have buried a couple of opinions dressed up as fact. First:

Kerry's proposal is a shift to fiscal policies as the economy is rebounding under Bush.

Um, presidents don't control the economy, remember? I know that thanks to Gringrich whining for years under Clinton. And, of course, Kerry is a flip-flopper:

Kerry was criticized during the last 18 months for failing to articulate a clear position on Iraq. He voted to give the president authority to go to war, but then criticized him for doing so without more diplomacy.

Yep, Kerry certainly should have known Bush was going to mess up anything he touched, and voted accordingly.

I repeat, who wrote this crap?

The smoker you link, the player you get...

So much great material, so little time; I've added Poker Blog Dude, don't mess with the unstable folk, and Whopundit to my link list. They all rock, and I suck.

Still have the monopoly on corgi commentary, though...

Let's play Carnac the Magnificient...

I hold the hermetically-sealed envelope to my forehead..."Pick the beaver."

"Pick the beaver."

[rip envelope open, blow inside, pull out the paper]

"You're being held hostage and you're given a choice; you will either be forced to watch President Bush insisting to reporters that a relationship exists between Hussein and Al-Qaeda despite a lack of evidence, or you will be left handcuffed in a cell with a testicle-nibbling beaver. What should you do?"

Shouldn't have had that extra cup of coffee before bed...

You...BASTARDS!!

I know I'm behind the times on this (no cable, you see, so I rely on my siblings' taping skills and DVD for the hot shows) but I just watched you-know-who get whacked on The Sopranos and I'm all upset...

And since I'm still harboring anger over Tara's death, I don't expect this to dissipate soon.

An open letter to Yahoo Mail...

Dear Sir or Madam,

I'd like to thank you for the extra storage space, awfully kind of you. I'll never use it, but it's appreciated. I understand the whole gmail thing's been a hassle for you. But upgrading my account really doesn't matter so much if I can't get on the mail server. If you don't mind, would you please unfuck yourself at the earliest convenience?

Warmest regards, N42

Give 'em hell, Howard...

This Kos diary has a link to Vermont Public Radio, where Howard Dean is talking on a call-in show. I've been pumping my fist and jumping with joy listening to the doctor rip Dubya a new one, tell a caller that we can't afford Nader, and get a lot of love from the callers... heh, Kos just got a shout-out.

Damn, I miss this man.

THAT'S IT??

CmdrSue forwarded to me an article about a man trying to set a record by playing poker for 72 hours straight. My first reaction is that the only way this record makes sense is if they don't allow you to put more money on the table after you lose it all.

But if it's an endurance record, then this is just the first guy who thought to call the Guinness people before he sat down to play.

Paul Begala is a schmuck...

The DNC is hosting a make-your-own-ad contest.

I have nothing to say about that, but when I got the e-mail there was a picture of Paul Begala (the judge) in it, and it reminded me of his anti-Dean hysteria. I always found his Crossfire persona to be a bit douchebaggy (what does it say if Tucker Carlson's more appealing?) but his Democratic primary commentary crossed him over into full schmuckitude.

So eat me, Begala, ya schmuck ya.

The sheer balls of the Virginia GOP...

As insane as it may sound, the Virginia GOP is now ranting at Mark Warner for creating a financial plan that will leave the state with a surplus.

The nutballs complain that Warner fudged the numbers to make sure the bill, which included some tax raises, got passed. The Dems deny it, Warner wasn't available for comment, and the article didn't mention that former Republican governor Jim Gilmore actually did fudge the numbers the other way in order to pass more car tax cuts (where's Nedra Pickler when you need her?)

Anyway, this editorial exposes Gilmore much better than I could, and doesn't resort to using the word "idiot"...

Unofficial Urban Challenge results...

We destroyed our old time, coming in at 4 hours 1 minute (50 minutes faster) and 60th place (may move up after DQed teams are removed).

Oodles of thanks to CmdrSue and sixthdoctor, we couldn't have done it without your help.

And now I'm going to pop another couple of Tylenol with Extra Codeine...

Cash for weed!

VA-5 Democratic candidate Al Weed, that is!

He's already stomped the 100K goal the blog (check the link on the right) had set up for June 30, and now they're shooting for $225K. That would cut the lead Virgil Goode has in fundraising by half, so throw a buck their way if you're inclined.

And even if you don't live in VA-5, read his blog. This guy is gooooooooood.

Think on the run, baby...

Sensible shoes and shorts? Check.

Television Without Pity Amazing Race "You Have Just Been Philiminated!" T-shirt? Check.

Anti-chafing ointment? Check.

Anti-chafing ointment applicator? Check.

Anti-chafing ointment applicator instructions? Check.

Anti-chafing ointment applicator instructions carrying case? Check.

Yep, I'm all packed and ready to head up to DC to take part in this year's Urban Challenge. The Urban Challenge is a scavenger hunt where two-person teams solve clues that point to various locations around the area, and then either run or take public transportation to those locations as quickly as possible. My sister and I, The Mighty Duo of Wonderfulness, are looking to improve upon last year's 81st-place finish. With my brother and CmdrSue providing technical support, I'm extremely confident that we'll break the top 75 this year!

Still a tad worried about the chafing, maybe I should stop by CVS for an unguent or two...

Happy Birthday, Mr. Monty...

Our corgi turned three today. I wanted to post a picture of the dog wearing a goofy birthday hat, but he didn't take too kindly to it.

I also spent so much time trying to get the picture that I think it's time to bring up to my wife the possibility of getting cable TV again, I see what happens when my brain isn't properly numbed...

*snif* A corgi's tale...

Get it? GET IT? Corgis don't have...sorry.

I look at the Corgi Aid rescue stories from time to time but this one, about Thomas, who is morbidly obese, made me want to run home and hug my Monty. Corgis are notorious chow hounds, of course, and because of their elongated backs you have to be especially careful about weight gain. And although corgis can have a round roly-poly look that's adorable, the pictures of Thomas just break my heart.

There also is a link to a home page for Thomas, where you can keep up on his progress. Let's all wish him well...

*sigh* Thanks a freakin' lot, Morrissey.

Yep, apparently Drudge (and I ain't linkin' to that schmuck) found out about the Mozzer's snarkiness and put it up on his website. Better to check out this Kos diary or the Moz-solo site if you want to weigh in.

As for me, meh. Morrissey's probably loving it right now, but pissing off wingnuts is kinda like smacking the obnoxious child running around and yelling in the food court. Sure, you want to do it, it'll feel good, and others may applaud you, but is it really necessary?

Ooooooo, bad form, Mozz...

Morrissey, apparently looking for some of that Dixie Chick cash, tastelessly said it should have been Dubya instead of Reagan this weekend.

Enjoy your shitstorm, dude, I'm just glad I got rid of cable so I don't have to watch it...

If you want to follow it, though, there's a huge discussion brewing at Morrissey-solo.com (the second comment down)...

Round 1 in Virginia...

Both parties held their respective state conferences over the weekend, and Tim Kaine fired off a nice salvo that emphasized the success Mark Warner's government has had cleaning up Jim Gilmore's mess.

Jim Gilmore, meanwhile, hit back with some red-meat rhetoric for the Repubs that had me checking my watch to make sure it wasn't 1997.

Um, Jimmy? Your car tax cut was nothing more than a disguised property-tax hike. Since I'm a homeowner who drives America's most stealable car, my taxes went up thanks to your policies. Screw you, taxraiser.

There is a God.

Finally, we have proof.

Let's get ready to rumble...

I'm amazed, but this poll has Kerry down by only two points. IN VIRGINIA. That result is so close I flat-out don't trust the poll, but Kerry can certainly ride on that news.

Since the state conventions for both parties are being held this weekend, the battle for this state is becoming more and more interesting.

I still get the feeling that the battle will ultimately resemble the last scene in the final episode of Angel, but I'm cautiously optimistic...

Maybe it's just me...

But here's our president...

Bush said, "Some who call themselves realists question whether the spread of democracy in the Middle East should be any concern of ours. But the realists in this case have lost contact with a fundamental reality: America has always been less secure when freedom is in retreat; America is always more secure when freedom is on the march."

I've read that a dozen times, does that make ANY fucking sense?

I'd rather have the Krispy Kreme back...

My wife, far more in touch with the world around us than yours truly, informed me last week that the buzz going around the neighborhood was that the new building being built about two blocks away was going to house an abortion clinic.

So my first response, naturally, was "Is this going to affect our property value?" Wait a minute. Is that correct? Let me check the Handbook for Liberals...lessee..."Why Won't They Listen?"...no..."Soothing Mantras to Chant When Rush Limbaugh is Playing in the Waiting Room"...ah, here we are, "Pecuniary Motives"...oh, ok, I'm allowed to have them.

So my first response, naturally, was "Is this going to affect our property value?" My wife, a real estate agent, said, "Nope..."

Whew.

"...unless, of course, someone blows the place up."

Eww.

I really don't want anti-abortion nutballs near where I live. My one experience w/them around here was on the way home from work a few years ago, when they were showing a giant fetus picture (that is, a giant picture of a fetus) on a busy intersection. I involuntary closed my eyes for about a second until I realized that was probably a stupid thing to do while driving. When I was a kid, the nutballs used to peacefully hold up signs like "Adoption, not abortion" at the abortion clinic across the street from the library. But nooooooo, now they have to be "in-your-face".

I blame rap music. Why not? Everyone else does.

Warner for veep?

On my drive to work this morning, our local station did a report on speculation that Mark Warner, our governor, was on the short list for Kerry's veep. My first thought was hey, could do a lot worse. Warner's popular, has been getting a wide range of support, I guess he's technically "Southern", which is good for the ticket-balancing thing, and most importantly, he's now got a track record of cleaning up the mess left by a Republican administration.

But the guy's not that dynamic, I mean, that's what I like about him, his pragmatism is refreshing after Jim Gilmore's ideologically-driven assholery. But we've already got "staid and pragmatic" in Kerry.

Personally, I'd rather have Edwards. He doesn't have Warner's record, but he's got a lot more charm.