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15 August 2010

Dear Warner Bros., just take my goddamn money already...

The new Looney Tunes discs came out this week and my response was the same I used to have to the Golden Collections magnified: strong desire for what should have been.

I've blogged in years past when one of the new Golden Collections were released, and despite having all six (sigh, yes, I know) and getting a whole lot of use of them, I found the haphazard nature of the collections frustrating. Every collection had a few gems, more than a few clunkers, and the WB trope of devoting a disc to a special theme ruined a bit of the magic through repetition. Seeing ALL the Speedy Gonzalez cartoons one right after the other really brings to light the recycled gags. I get, he knows everybody's sister in the sleepy Mexican hamlet. And by "knows" I mean "screws". Wait, getting off the point...

So while the new single discs seem a bit chintzy to me they do have the advantage of being focused on Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck. But once again, I have to deal with the absences. No "Racketeer Rabbit"? No "Captain Hareblower"? For the love of Elmer what the hell do I have to do to get these?

And to cap it all off, there's the ridiculously vague feather-across-the-taint pricktease announcement that a Looney Tunes Blu-Ray is forthcoming. Which brings me to the subject line. Just release 'em all, or at the very least release are the cartoons in a certain period so I KNOW WHAT ELSE I'LL NEED TO BUY. The six Golden Collections together were about $300 and represented about half of the total oeuvre. So tack on a twenty percent asshole tax and let's be done with it. You don't have THAT long to milk nerds, soon it'll all be the cloud. I'm telling you right now, WB, get on it.

And then, fully satiated with my Blu-Rays, I'll be nice and docile while you rape my childhood.

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