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02 July 2005

16 days...

...with nary a post? What's up? Who gives a sweet fuck? As Ricky Roma would say, "What's the fucking point?"

I like my little corner, I really do, but hundreds do it better, so when the outrages come fast and furious, enough scramble to cover the latest one by the time I grab my thoughts together it's not only redundnant, it's repetitive. That doesn't bother me, what does is the plummeting level of discourse in this country. Granted, that's nothing new, but it's been seeping into my real life. How can one discuss things with people who believe in the Rapture? And I don't mean nouvelle-American-at-reasonable-prices with pet-friendly-outdoor-seating Rapture. People around here need a good smack upside the head with a Homey-The-Clown inflated bladder stuffed with quarters. And if I never heard another wingnut's fake outrage it would be too soon. Yes, I live in Virginia, and I can walk down the street without fear of homos getting married. I think that's our state motto, "Live Without Fear of Marryin' Homos". Of course, it sucks for all those closeted Republicans like Ed Schrock, forced to live a double life, but hey, they made their bed.

I'm a Yankee, I know it, it doesn't matter how long I live in VA, I'll always say "War of Nothern Aggression" while rolling my eyes. And I've lived in states where Republicans ruled, somewhat effectively I may add. New Jersey, Maine, I thought I could deal. But it's fucking loony down here. I mean loony. I was expecting Kevin Phillips-Bong but we got Tarquin Fintimlimbinwhinbimlin-bustop F'tang F'tang Ole Biscuitbarrel. Loony, I tells ya. I moved down here ten years ago to streets festooned with "NO CAR TAX!" signs; Jim Gilmore won the governorship with that slogan. I think that's all he had. No public appearances, no tv spots, just a bunch of signs that said NO CAR TAX! And maybe a sign or two that said
"My Opponent's a liberal. And gay. But I'm not." He won big. And ran this state into the fucking ground. Mind you, he did cut the car tax, which I'm sure was a relief to the hundreds of thousands like me that saved $50 on their 7-year-old cars only to take it up the tush as a first-time homebuyer with huge property tax hikes to compensate for the enormous shortfall. Being the worst governor in Virginia is saying something, mind you. It was, however, one of the few points in the state's history where the retarded idea of limiting governors to one term in office had its upside. How shitty was Gilmore as a governor? Virginians elected a Democrat, Mark Warner, who balanced the budget, made all the tough choices Gilmore refused to make, and returned this state to solvency. We have one of the highest bond ratings in the country. Even Republicans broke ranks with their bibble-bibble-oatbran party in order to support this; Warner got a cut in the food tax (how fucked we are example #38, we paid higher taxes on food than cigarettes, yeah I know, tobacco farmers, don't care). But Warner leaves in November.

So we've got a new race, Jerry Kilgore v. Tim Kaine. Now, you'd think, maybe, just maybe, people would say "well, as an economic conservative, my natural urge is to vote Republican, but Kilgore comes from that hyper-radical wing of the Republican party that looks simply to cut progressive taxes that favor the rich without compensatory budget measures. We've already seen how much damage this can do after four years in Virginia, and for that matter, five years on a federal level. While I'm also conservative on social issues, the fact is both state houses are so overwhelmingly Republican the Bills are going to win the Super Bowl before homos get married here, so why not make a vote for common sense, and go with the party that has illustrated they understand how to run the government in this state?"

Ok, maybe I'm the only that thinks that should happen. Hence the frustration.

Mind you, the "call the other guy a liberal and faglover" strategy would probably get the Gobbledygooker 51% of the vote here. I just wish the VA Republican party would run someone that charismatic and intelligent. Once John Warner retires, the Virginia Republican party will be represented by Gilmore and Kilgore, toady li'l crapweasels that have put in their time but I wouldn't trust to run my local McDonald's, and cretins like George Allen and Virgil Goode, vacuous dimbulbs whose reputation as lightweights in Congress is masked by their spindly, pale, Ashley Wilkes-esque physical appearance which passes for good (in)breeding down here in the South. I feel for those that are working to try to save us from ourselves, I'm starting to think that we're just doomed to get the representatives we deserve, and maybe I'd be better served just devoting more time to a new hobby. How about rims? Kids seem to like the rims. My '95 Saturn does need some sprucing up...

I'm tired, I'm going to crawl back under my bed now. Talk to you in 16 days.

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