I'm a TARbitch, he's a TARbitch, wouldn't you like to be a TARbitch too?

TAR, of course, is The Amazing Race, which has gone from merely being the best reality show on TV to perhaps being the best form of entertainment ever devised by human beings. What's not to love? The exotic locales, the incredibly hot host (um, so I've heard), and the thrill of watching loved ones rip into each other with fury after being pressed into unbelievably stressful situations.

Yep, no one goes through the race without a blow-up or two (or in the case of Flo, about six million), but we forgive, and forget, because I'd hate to think of how I'd react to one of my temper tantrums becoming, say, a hot pop-culture item for sale.

While every reality show has its share of douchebags, assholes, and clueless wonders, the non-Flo "villians" of TAR have largely been redeemed and enjoy a cult following. Wanna survive a Race and still show your face to the American public? Two rules:

1. It's perfectly fine to snap and blow your top, but do try your absolute best not to treat your partner like shit.
2. Don't blame the editors.

I'll see y'all in the audition for AR7 (right, sis?) ;)