Christ, we're in more trouble than I thought...

I got a mailer from the Army Reserve yesterday, wondering if I'd be interested in becoming an Army of One. I've been promised big bux for college ("Make More Than Spare Change in your Spare Time", I'm guessing the "...and We're Sending You to Iraq" part got left off by the publishers), an additional stipend, "generous textbook allowance", and I get the opportunity to enter the Army as an officer.

Yeah, all of that's persuasive, but I was almost sold thanks to the free T-shirt.

For those of you just tuning in, I'm 33, got my doctorate not too long ago, and slightly more manly than Gene Wilder's character in The Producers.

They've got balls.